Wonderful definitions

School

A place where Parents pay and children play

Life Insurance

A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

         

Nurse:

A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

Marriage

It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains

her masters...

Tears

The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine

waterpower.

Lecture

An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the

notes of  the students without passing through "the minds of either"

Conference

The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Compromise

The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the

biggest piece

Dictionary

A place where success comes before work

Conference Room

A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later

on

Father

A banker provided by nature

Criminal

A person no different from the rest....except that he/she got caught

Boss

Someone who is early when you are late and  late when you are early

Politician

One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after

DOCTOR

A person who holds your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

Classic

Books, which people praise, but do not read.

Smile

A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Office

A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Yawn

The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Etc.

A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Committee

Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing

can be done together.

Experience

The name men give to their mistakes.

Atom Bomb

An invention to end all inventions.

Philosopher

A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise