LOL...!!!

1.  Sir:* What is the difference between Orange and Apple?*
Sardar: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE.
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2.  SADARJI bought a new mobile.
He sent a message to everyone from his Phone Book & said,
'My Mobile No. Has changed. Earlier it was Nokia 3310. Now it is 6610'
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3.  SADARJI : I am Proud, coz my son is in Medical College .
Friend:   Really, what is he studying?
SADARJI : No, he is not studying, they are Studying him.
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4.  SADARJI : Doctor, in my dreams, I play football every night.
DR: Take this tablet, you will be ok.
SADARJI : Can I take it tomorrow, tonight is final game.
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5.  SADARI : If I die, will you remarry?
Wife: No! I'll stay with my sister. But if I die will you remarry?
SADARJI : No, I'll also stay with your sister.
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6.  SADARJI complained to the police: 'Sir, all items are missing, except the TV in my house.'
Police: 'How the thief did not take TV?'
SADARJI : 'I was watching TV news...'
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7.  SADARJI comes back to his car & find a note saying 'Parking Fine'
He Writes a note and sticks it to a pole 'Thanks for the compliment.'
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8.  How do you recognize SADARJI in School?
He is the one who erases the notes from the book when the  teacher erases the board.
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9.  SADARJI in a bar and his cellular phone rings.
He picks it up and Says 'Hello, how did you know I was here?'
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10.SADARJI : Why are all these people running?
Man - This is a race, the winner will get the cup
SADARJI - If only the  winner will get the cup, why others are running?
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11.Teacher: 'I killed a person' convert this sentence into future tense.
SADARJI : The future tense is 'you will go to jail'
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12.Sardar:* My mobile bill how much?*
Call centre girl:* Sir, just dial 123 from your mobile to know current bill status*
Sardar:* Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL. *
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13.Sardar: *I think that girl is deaf..*
Friend:* How do you know?*
Sardar: *I told I Love her, but she said her Sandals are new *
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14.Friend:* I got a brand new Ford IKON for my wife!*
Sardar:* Wow!!! That's an unbelievable exchange offer!!! *
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15.Teacher:* Which is the oldest animal in world?*
Sardar:*ZEBRA*
Teacher:* How?*
Sardar:* Bcoz it is Black & White *
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16.Judge:* Don't U have shame? It is the 3rd time you are coming to court..*
Sardar to judge:* You are coming daily to court, don't you have shame?
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17.Sardar attending an interview in Software Company.*
Manager:* Do you know MS Office?*
Sardar:*If you give me the address I will go there sir.*
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18.Sardar in airplane going to Bombay ..
While its landing he shouted:"Bombay ... Bombay "*
Air hostess said: *"B silent."*
Sardar:* "Ok... Ombay. Ombay"
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19.Teacher: "What is common between JESUS, KRISHNA, RAM, GANDHI and BUDHA?"
Sardar: "All are born on government holidays...!!!*
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